Erin's Dance

The dance was on Friday and was not well put together. The kids had fun for the first 45 minutes or so and then it quickly went downhill. My job was to guard a door and not let anyone out so they could better monitor the kids, which allowed me to just kid watch and it was amusing. There were no slow dances and no couples, so that part was good. The kids were really uncomfortable with the whole thing, you could just tell and after 1 1/2 hours, we left.

Erin did look cute, though. Here is a picture.

My Favorite Gadget

I am a gadget lover. Jonathan always says if I lived in the days of traveling salesmen, I would be their favorite stop and I can be a sucker for trying those things. Most of them are a disappointment, but this has been my favorite purchase of the year.

The Bissell Steam Mop from Amazon.com for only $65 ... what a deal! I love, love, love this thing! This thing only uses water to clean and I now enjoy mopping my floors and that is saying something. I have a very large kitchen floor, all tile, and it was a nightmare in my opinion until I got this. It is also great for hardwood floors. It looks so clean and I have noticed the dirt does not stick to the tile the way it used to and sweeps up much easier. Now the next thing I need is a dog to eat all the scraps away and then maybe, finally, it will stay looking clean!

Who says Kids don't remember?

I found this on my bed this morning where Lindsey had emptied the contents of her backpack and I thought it was very sweet.

You may want to enlarge it Briana ... hint, hint!

A realization

I have had an eye opening experience on children. If you have well behaved children without lots of issues, regular discipline works very effectively. You can do time outs, behavior charts, reward incentives, etc. Michael never needed those things, just always behaved, but it works fantastic for Erin and for Andrew for the most part. However, if you have children with issues regular discipline does nothing. It doesn't even matter to them. They are so strung out that it's like they cannot even understand what is happening. It is really like their brain is just stuck ... crying, misbehaving, raging, hitting, etc and you cannot reason with them. They also do not have the ability to feel remorse until it is all over. I don't know how much good counseling does when they are in that mode. I say this because we have been though years of counseling, first with Michael and then with Lindsey, Jenna, and still Michael. Michael is easy for counseling because he does not want to feel anxiety/ocd thoughts and so he is very motivated to take whatever they have to say and implement it. Lindsey, however, had no vested interest in the counseling. She did not care how she was making others feel, I think because her feelings/actions were too complex for her to understand and I also don't believe she had the maturity required. I say this all because now that Lindsey's moods are controlled, she does not require discipline but if she did, she has the ability to feel badly for what she has done. She also is in a "normal" state of mind where charts,incentives, etc are appealing to her and I believe would work. It is very easy to look at others and judge -- they should do that with their child, etc. and I know there are things that Jonathan and I have totally failed on, but when you have children that are constantly crying, screaming, raging, whining, etc. and the regular discipline does not work, you get very, very tired. I told our bishop last night that we only started scripture study again because our children truly could not be in the same room together. Now that would be easy to look and judge again from someone else's perspective, no you have to do family scripture reading, your family will be blessed, but when you have the kids to yourself and no spouse to help and they are about killing each other, it put my stress level up to unhealthy leavels. At times, they are misbehaving because you have not done what you need to do but you just don't want to do it anymore. You just want to have a well behaved child. And most of the time, you have done all the right things, but the end situation is no better. I'm not talking about a kid whining for candy in the grocery store or having an occasional tantrum or misbehavior, I am talking about the constant issues -- they wear on you and make you feel defeated. You get tired of constantly being on guard and waiting for the next problem. When we went bowling something happened with Lindsey and I said, you know we don't do that and so you need to stop and she said, okay and stopped and that was it. What, I thought, where is the screaming, crying, raging, hand flapping,etc. Not there ... oh my goodness, I felt like it was way too easy.

Thanksgiving

We had a nice, quiet Thanksgiving this year. The bottom line is, we didn't want to invite anyone or go anywhere. We just wanted Jonathan to ourselves. He was exhausted after driving home until around 1:00 am Thursday morning and we had a relaxing day. The kids got to jump all over him and play crazy. It was awesome. On Friday we went bowling. Now for most of you, this is not a big thing but to have all of our kids and to have them all have fun, behaving, no tantrums, no running around, no getting mad because someone scored higher and just to laugh and have fun was a humongous treat. Jenna said she things she found a new hidden talent - that yes, with the bumpers in, she beat us all! I made my first apple pies this year because I do hate pie, but they turned out very good. My tastes are slightly changing and I can see a little bit why people like pie now and am thinking I may even eat some next year.
On Saturday, Michael and Jonathan played a church football game and we went and cheered them on. As usual, we went and picked up a young man but only one because I wouldn't allow for more than that because I wanted us to all go together and not have to drive two vehicles. It amazed me that even with Jonathan home for just a few days, we had people calling and asking if we would get their kids when there was no reason their own parents could not take them. They know Jonathan is just home for a few days and yet they still wanted him to drive all around the county and pick people up (not leaders, parents). That was amazing to me how inconsiderate they thought to be of our time together. I'm not brewing about it, just kind of amazed!

Jenna does not seem to be so well improved anymore. I don't know what happened, but she is kind of back to herself. Jenna's medicine was not tailored for her - just a general one they sell. Lindsey's was put together specifically for her symptoms and she continues to behave beautifully. She was so fun - laughing, joking, happy and NOT MOODY for the entire holiday. She is such a joy and really does have a great personality! She is sleeping well, eating well, and using the bathroom well. Jonathan was pretty amazed at the change in her and at first, thought Jenna was going well, too, but it does seem like Lindsey's doctor is certainly the better of the two -- or possibly Lindsey is just responding better. However, I tend to think it is just better medicine. Yesterday, for the first time in years, Lindsey did not melt down after Primary and start her hand flapping and crying fit stating that she just had to leave right at that second. I don't know if she is digesting food better or maybe her blood sugar is better regulated, but she normally has a fit that she is hungry but doesn't know what is the matter, etc. She just waited patiently and stayed happy. She also played her first complete game on Fri. night and did not quit or go off in a huff. She lost gracefully and happy. Now what to do with Jenna ... we are trying one more month on her drops and if not better, she will also go to Lindsey's doctor (who is much more expensive) which is the reason for the reluctance.